Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 (ESV) says, “For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted; a time to kill, and a time to heal;

a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; a time to seek, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; a time to tear, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; a time to love, and a time to hate; a time for war, and a time for peace.”

It’s true. There is a season for everything from being born to dying and a ton of stuff in between. I’ve been experiencing a change in seasons lately. 

My Childhood Dream

For the past 17 years I have been a stay at home wife and mom. Ever since I was a little girl all I ever wanted was to be a wife and mom. I was one of those little girls who had her doll that she loved to carry around with her everywhere she went. To me, that doll wasn’t just a toy. Rather, it was a “real” baby and practice for when I had an actual real live baby of my own. Of course I knew my doll was not alive. That didn’t stop me from imagining it to be so! 

As I got older I lived for the day when I could babysit and teach Sunday School. My teenage years were spent watching other people parent, and taking mental notes of what worked and what obviously did not work. I loved teaching kids anything and everything. When I was 16 I decided to give nursing school a shot. As I learned about the different names of the bones in the body, I would teach that to the kids I babysat. Looking back it’s funny to think that a 16 year old was teaching a three or four year old the names of the bones. At the time it was completely natural. 

Not The Right Path For Me

I only did nursing school for a year, and then realized something. I really dislike taking care of sick people. The book learning part was fun, but the actual nursing was definitely not for me. It was then I decided that education was my calling. I graduated high school and pursued a degree in elementary education. I was a really talented teacher. It was amazing watching the kids grow and learn. It was incredible watching the light bulb go off in their minds as they finally understood what I was teaching. I look back at that season of my life with gratitude and joy. 

The Absolute Right Path For Me

The next season of my life came in January of 2003. This is when I met my husband. It would take us 11 months from the day we met to the day we got married. My life would never be the same. I actually had to quit my teaching job to get married, and thus ended my season as a classroom teacher. Still, I loved being married to Brett. (To be honest, I still love being married to Brett.) We would get married on November 29, 2003, and move to Lubbock, Texas soon after. Brett was still working on his engineering degree. 

This new season of moving away from my whole family, and being a wife to an engineering student would prove to be challenging. I would find myself to be extremely lonely and isolated. I moved to a new place, where the only person I knew was my husband. He only knew bachelors (which was a good thing). I also never knew the amount of hours it took to get an engineering degree. Brett would finally come home after being at school all day, and then spend the night studying. 

We did join a newly married group at church. After a while we met some really amazing couples. I started hanging out with one of the wives who was also married to an engineering student. We had a ton of fun just doing normal life things together. Once we met some friends the loneliness subsided quite a bit. This is a season I now look back on with fondness. 

A Short Season

Brett graduated in May of 2005 and thus started our next season. We didn’t know it then, but this would start the season of lots of moving. We moved back to my hometown, bought a house, and decided it was time to start having kids. Brett and I figured we would be in my hometown for the rest of our lives. Boy were we ever wrong about that! We ended up only living there for about a year and a half. Then the Lord moved us to Phoenix, Arizona. I look at that season as a blur of excitement! 

A Season Of Dream Fulfillment

The next season had us in Arizona. Life was constantly changing for us. We moved there as a family of 2 and moved away 6 years later as a family of 5. Life was never dull in this season. Brett and I learned how to be parents together. We learned to rely on each other because we were all the support we had there. We learned the value of having family nearby, and longed for that someday. At the end of this season we started a brand new season that has yet to end. We launched into the world of homeschooling. Never in a million years did I think I would ever be a homeschool mom, but here I am on year 12!  I look back at this season with exhaustion! 

Another Short Season

The following season would have us back in my hometown for 10 months. The real season began when we moved to Ireland for a year and a half. I had never left the United States, and I was feeling nervous about not just visiting another country, but living there. I couldn’t just decide I wanted to go home and hop on a plane. Ireland was my home for that season. In fact we didn’t even have a place to call home back in the United States. 

A Season Of Adventure

This season was filled with travel, learning new ways to think and do things. It’s amazing how different that language can be between America and Ireland. Sure, we both speak English. However, our English is quite different from each other. What we call a stove, they call a cooker. It was like learning a new language that you already knew. I look at that season with fondness and adventure!

Our Next Big Season

The season of living overseas ended and with it began our next season of life. This season would bring us to Austin, Texas. Our move here was a rollercoaster. You can read all about this season in this post. This season was exciting and hard. Fun and frustrating. It’s a season we have yet to leave, and for that I am thankful! 

My Next New Season

This brings me to the present. Of course there have been many other mini seasons that have occurred along the way. Things like starting this blog, starting a church, and moving from our rental home to the home we own. We’ve had friends come and go from our lives. We have even chosen to remove ourselves from people’s lives from time to time. To write about all those little seasons would take forever! 

Still, this leads up to the next change of season for me. About a month ago a good friend was over. She was telling me about her next season of opening up a new business. She was contacted by this company to open up a new branch for caregivers. My friend would be in charge of the whole office. She would hire an office person who would do the scheduling, interviewing, and training of the new caregivers. My friend would also be in charge of finding the clients for the caregivers. Mostly the clientele would be elderly people who just need extra help doing everyday tasks. 

As she was describing the company, and all she was about to embark on, and that she needed an office person, I jokingly said, “I can do that!” When I said that I could feel my spirit get super excited. I actually knew right then that this was in fact going to be something I will do. My friend instantly said, “I would love to have you team up with me.” I couldn’t commit to this drastic new change without talking to Brett and the kids. However, when I told them our idea of me working for our friend, they all got super excited and told me I should do it! 

A Season Of Grief

This launched me into a temporary season. A season where I had to come to grips with the idea that my identity was: 1. Way too wrapped up in my family. 2. Way too entangled as a stay at home wife and homeschool mom. 

This new revelation drove me to a short season of grief. I had to grieve the end of my season as a stay at home mom. Yes, I would only be 20 minutes away, but my attention would be dedicated to a job and not wholly to my family. I have loved being a stay at home mom. I love being able to give my whole attention to my family. Running errands for my husband, or just being at the house so the repair man can come has been my delight.

I truly had to grieve all of this. It’s difficult to put into words just how I felt. On the one hand I knew I was doing the right thing. But on the other hand I felt like my world just came crashing down. My whole life, the only life I ever wanted was leaving me. At least that’s how I felt. I now realize that my family will always be there. I will always have a relationship with my kids. Yes, the relationship will change. In fact, it has already changed a lot over the years!

Just The Way It’s Supposed To Be

This is the way God intended life to be. We aren’t meant to stay in one season forever. It’s good to move from season to season. Sometimes it feels exciting to move from one season to the next. Other times it feels scary and daunting. Some seasons are filled with joy and excitement. While others are filled with grief and sadness. Still, this is the way God planned it for us while we reside on Earth. We are meant to feel these emotions. How else can we learn to really trust God and know he has only the very best for us. 

I don’t know what this next season holds. What I do know is that God is leading me into this new season. I also know that when God leads me to new seasons they are always filled with great things. So, I am both excited and sad to enter into this next season. I guess you will have to stick around to find out how it goes!